Thursday, December 15, 2005

At the risk of sounding like a bad stand-up comedian, I'm still going to make this post. Unlike said comedian, to me, this isn't a stand-up bit, but a real question, concern, and issue. And with that, I would ask that you treat it with the appropriate level of seriousness and concern.

What's the deal with pants?

Specifically, why are they referred to in the plural form?

Example sentence: "Oh Monica, those pants are like so stellar on you."

Clearly, the pant is one embodiment of fabrics and threads and thus is being misrepresented by the popular designation. Take for example, socks. By their very nature, they travel in packs of two, thereby earning them the correct plural status. Meanwhile, there is the shirt. Just like the pant, it is one embodiment of fabric and whatnot, and yet we respect it by referring to it in the singular. Shirt.

Now I don't want to cause a global stink here, but I just can't turn a blind eye to this massacre of civility. It is my intention to use the proper singular nomenclature from now on. It is my prayer that you'll do the same. Except in the case of leather pants. They don't deserve any respect.

13 Comments:

Blogger Anonymous Assclown said...

Ask and ye shall receive -

http://www.worldwidewords.org/qa/qa-pai1.htm

What do I win?

1:38 PM

 
Blogger :: STEVE :: said...

Wow. Impressive. I'm quite liking the original term of "pantaloons" and will now adopt that into my regular vocabulary.

You win an open mouthed kiss from yours truly. Oh yeah!

1:42 PM

 
Anonymous jenn said...

open mouthed kiss huh? you've got a 50/50 chance of that turning out really bad.

2:05 PM

 
Blogger :: STEVE :: said...

I know. I just realized that not only was the above posters name withheld, so was his/her gender. Make that a closed mouth kiss, just to be safe.

2:27 PM

 
Blogger more caffeine, please said...

So are you also going to ban the words, nylons, stockings, and chaps?

2:38 PM

 
Blogger :: STEVE :: said...

Yes, but for completely different reasons.

2:42 PM

 
Blogger ~j. said...

Did you ever see that skit from "The State" where the guy buys pants? That's my favorite.

3:44 PM

 
Blogger Gus said...

thats the most intersting topic I have heard discussed today. I think I will bring it up in my blog. nice.

4:41 PM

 
Anonymous RUDD GOOF said...

capn, lose the pic at the top...its startin to creep me out.

6:36 PM

 
Blogger c jane said...

Nice use of "singular nomenclature"
Props.

9:18 PM

 
Blogger AzĂșcar said...

They should call it 'Roundtine.'

10:01 AM

 
Blogger Kacy said...

Seriously. And what is the deal with people who say they went "to University" when they aren't British? Gotta run--I'm off to Mall.

11:51 AM

 
Anonymous CreditCirl said...

I'll tell you what...The word pantS is in plural, because they kinda consist of two parts:one for the left leg, the other for the right leg. that's the reason :)

10:48 PM

 

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